时间:2017年12月11日 08:26:42

Experts claim that women are more attracted to men if they believe they will help out with household chores and make an equal contribution towards childcare.专家称,如果女人认为男人会帮忙干家务,并一起照顾孩子,那么她们会更容易被吸引。British men make some of the best husbands in the world because they are more willing to do housework, new research suggests.新的调查显示,英国男人因为更愿意干家务而成为世界上最好的丈夫之一。The study, which looked at relationships in 13 countries, ranked British men as the third most likely to win women's hearts through their apparent commitment to domestic life.这项研究调查了13个国家的伴侣关系,结果英国男人在赢得女人芳心的排行榜上名列第三,因为他们更愿意在家庭生活中承担起责任。Swedes and Norwegians topped the table while Australian men--stereotyped for their love of beer, sport, and the great outdoors--came in last, rated as the least attractive in terms of pulling their weight around the house.瑞典和挪威在这一排行上荣居前两位,而澳大利亚男人——由于他们钟爱啤酒、运动和户外活动——排在了最后,被评为最不具吸引力的男人,因为他们在家务上不够尽力。The Oxford University study examined marriage and cohabitation rates across the developed world and compared them to attitudes towards the roles of men and women at home.牛津大学的研究考察了发达国家人口的结婚率和同居率,并把这些数据同男人和女人看待家庭角色的态度做了比较。Researchers questioned 13,500 men and women aged between 20 and 45 from each country about gender, housework and childcare responsibilities.每个国家有13500人参与调查,年龄在20到45岁之间。研究人员就性别、家务和照顾孩子的责任等方面展开提问。Based on their responses, each country was given a rating on an "egalitarian index", which was then compared against the number of couples living together.根据他们的回答,每个国家都得出了一个“平等主义指数”,并把这一指数和在一起生活的男女人数相比较。The study found there was a correlation between the ratings on the index and proportion of citizens who were married or shared their home with a partner.研究发现指数高低与结婚或同居的人数比例是相关的。Women in less egalitarian countries were found to be between 20 and 50 per cent less likely to settle down with a man.研究还发现,在“平等主义”势力比较弱的国家,20%到50%的女人比较不愿意与男人组建家庭。Dr Almudena Seville-Sanz, of the university's Centre for Time Use Research, said: "This study shows that in egalitarian countries there is less social stigma attached to men doing what was traditionally women's work.牛津大学时间调查研究中心的阿慕德娜·瑟维尔-桑茨士说:“这次研究显示,在平等主义盛行的国家,男人分担传统上由女人来做的工作比较不会被人看不起。”"This leads to men in egalitarian societies taking on more of a domestic role so the likelihood of forming a harmonious household becomes greater, resulting in a higher proportion of couples setting up households in these countries."“在平等主义盛行的社会,男人在家庭中参与得越多,共建一个和谐家庭的可能性就越大,其结果就是在这些国家中共同组建家庭的夫妇的比例也就越高。”However, while the study suggested that women favour men who are willing to treat them as equals, it also found that men themselves placed less value on the quality in the opposite sex.虽然这一研究显示女人更喜欢那些平等对待她们的男人,但是研究也发现男人对女人的地位并不是很重视。The full list of countries' rankings on the egalitarian index is as follows:各个国家在平等主义指数上的排名名单如下:1. Sweden 瑞典2. Norway 挪威3. Great Britain 英国4. ed States 美国5. Northern Ireland 北爱尔兰6. Netherlands 荷兰7. Republic of Ireland 爱尔兰共和国8. Spain 西班牙9. New Zealand 新西兰10. Japan 日本11. Germany 德国12. Austria 奥地利13. Australia 澳大利亚 /200908/80746

1- Speaking skillsWhether you are hustling for a promotion when you bump into a CEO in an elevator or making an important speech at an international conference, the ability to speak with a wide variety of people is an absolute essential. Good eye contact, a varied vocabulary and the ability to tailor your language to suit your audience are all essential characteristics of an artful speaker. Being a good speaker will give you presence and make you memorable to those who are listening. Practice talking with anyone and everyone you meet, look for a debating society or a Toastmasters group. The rewards are worth it. Being more adept in social situations and being better equipped to network successfully will help you forge working relationships that could be very advantageous to you in the future. It will also be useful to you for performing duties as a best man or maid of honor.1. 演讲技巧你也许在电梯里巧遇到一名CEO,然后想尽方法让自己获得升职机会,或者是在一个国际性会议上做一次重要讲话,无论是哪一种情况,在众人面前演讲的能力都是绝对不可或缺的。 优秀演讲者的必要品质:正确的目光接触,丰富的词汇,还有编织你的语言来迎合你的听众。 成为一名优秀的演说者会赋予你良好的风度,让听众对你印象深刻。 你可以和任何人,每个你遇到的人练习说话,找一找辩论社团,或者司仪小组。 这些都值得一试。 在社交场合中更加熟练、在人际关系网中成功地有着更好的装备都可以帮助你打造有效地人际关系,从而让你在未来占尽优势。 比如说担当伴郎或者伴娘。 /201004/101947

1. Get to know your authentic self. 认清真实的自己。Discover the real you. Don't blindly accept the role you were conditioned by others to fill. You have your own path to follow. Be your own independent person. Don't allow peer pressure to force you into an inauthentic role。发现真实的自己。不要盲目接受别人习惯施加给你的角色。你有自己的路去走。成为独立自主的个体。不要在压力的屈从下扮演不真实的自己。2. Own your power. 拥有自己的力量。Accept full responsibility for your life. Don't live as a doormat, a sheep, or a victim. Stop giving away your power. You must accept that you're the creator of your life and that no one is coming to rescue you。承担起你生活中应付的所有责任。不要活得像个擦鞋垫、绵羊或者受害者。不要放弃你的力量。你必须认为自己是生活的创造者,没有人会来拯救你。 3. Find your voice. 倾听自己的声音。Build the courage to express yourself authentically. Speak your truth. You deserve to be heard. If others react negatively, that's their problem. Ask for what you want; you can't expect others to be mind-ers. You teach others how you want to be treated-not by dropping hints but by telling them directly. If you don't speak up for yourself, who will?真实地建立起表达自己的勇气。说出你的事实。你值得别人倾听。如果别人反应很消极,那是他们的问题。问问自己想要什么;不能指望别人能读懂你的心。告诉别人你想被如何对待——不是给出提示而是直接告诉他们。如果你不能为自己大声说出需求,还有谁会为你这样做呢?4. Find your tribe. 寻找自己的部落。Consciously build and nurture a supportive network of positive relationships, including family and friends. Drop relationships that drain you; maintaining them is self-abuse. If you don't like your current relationships, it's up to you to change that. Surround yourself with good people who love you and inspire you. You deserve the very best relationships。有意识地建立和培养一个积极的包括家庭和朋友在内的人际关系网,结束拖你后腿的关系;维持这些关系纯属自责。如果你不喜欢当下的关系,那么自己决定是否改变。让围绕在你周围的都是爱你和鼓舞你的人。你值得拥有最好的人际关系。5. Practice self-care. 照顾好自己的感受。Give yourself permission to do what you enjoy. Demands from other people can wait. Accept that you can't do everything for everyone. You can't give to others when you're empty inside。允许自己做喜欢的事情。别人的需要可以等等。认清自己不能为所有的人做所有的事。当你内心空虚的时候,你便无法施与他人。 /200903/65423

remove unneeded possessions. minimalism forces you to live in the present. removing items associated with past memories or lives frees us up to stop living in the past and start living in the present. 去掉不必要的包裹。简约主义迫使你活在当下。抛开和过去的记忆或生活相关的东西,让自己停止活在过去,自由的开始现在的生活。 /201004/100746

We've all had to start conversations that we ded having – everything from asking for a raise to asking for a divorce to asking for help with the laundry. These strategies help the conversation go more smoothly -- at least, that's the hope.每个人都曾不得不进行另自己惧怕的谈话——如:要求加薪、提出离婚、请求帮助洗衣。下面的方法帮你让谈话更顺利,至少希望如此。1. Don't stall. Let's say you need to call an acquaintance whom you haven't seen in a few years to ask for a favor. Don't chat and chat, then casually mention the favor at the end. You're not going to fool him about why you called. It's better to say something like, "It's so great to talk to you. I really want to catch up and hear everything that's been going on for the last few years, but first, I have to tell you the reason I called." Otherwise, the person on the other end tends to feel wary and distracted.不要拖延。比如:你要打电话给一位认识的人,两人有些年没有见面了,你要让他帮忙。 不要聊个没完,到结束时才突然提出请帮忙的事。对于你打电话的原因,人家心知肚明。最好这样说:“和你聊天真不错。我很想聊聊最近几年的情况,听听发生的每件事,但首先我要告诉你我打电话的理由。” 否则容易让对方警惕和分心。2. Don't start off angry. If you have to make some sort of charge, of dishonesty or bad service or a screw-up, work yourself into a mild state of mind. Anger inspires anger; accusations inspire defensiveness. Explain the situation in a straightforward way. Joke around. Show that you're a reasonable person.不要怒气冲冲地开始谈话。如果你要对欺骗、差的务或一次办砸的事做出控诉,那么先让自己情绪缓和。愤怒会激发愤怒;指责会激发抵抗。直接了当地说明情况。开开玩笑。展现出自己是一个讲道理的人。3. This is obvious, but pick your moment. The Big Girl chooses to pester me with her pleas to get her ear pierced just before school, just before bed, or when I'm rifling in the refrigerator with a wolfish look. She couldn't pick worse times. Look for a moment of calm, lack of interruption, and physical comfort. Also, if the conversation will be particularly painful to the other person, choose circumstances that are the most comfortable for him or her, not for you. Sometimes, when you're ding saying something, you just want to blurt it out and get it over with -- but by waiting, you might get a better result. (See #8 on this, too.)即使是容易被理解的事情,要说也得选择时机。可我的大闺女总选择在上学前一刻、睡前或我正当带着豺狼般贪婪的面目洗劫冰箱时来纠缠我,恳求我允许她穿耳洞。她选择的时机简直是糟糕透顶。要找一个没有干扰、身体舒适、平静的时刻。而且,如果对话让另一方感到痛苦,那么选择对他/她而言(不是对你而言)最为舒适的环境。有时候,当你害怕说某件事,你只希望脱口而出,然后了事——可是等一会再说,你也许会获得更好的结果(参考第八点)。4. Think about why the subject is difficult for you. Do you hate to talk about money? Do you shrink from doing anything that smacks of self-promotion? Do you dislike confrontation? Are you afraid of someone? Are you concerned about damaging a relationship? One of the most helpful of my Twelve Commandments is "Identify the problem." If you examine why you're ding a particular conversation, you might be able to tackle it in a different way, or re-frame the issue in a way that's less upsetting.想一想为什么这话题难以启齿。你讨厌谈论钱吗?带有自荐意味的事情会让你退缩吗?你不喜欢交涉?你害怕某人?你担心破坏一段关系?在我“十二戒律”中最有帮助的一条是“辨认问题”。如果你弄清楚为何害怕某种对话,你也许能采取另一种方式来应对,或者可以用一个不愉快度较低的方式重构问题。5. Are you certain you need to discuss the difficult subject, at all? Often, you do. Sometimes, you don't. Will it really serve a purpose to have the conversation?你确信自己有必要去讨论这一困难话题吗?经常是的。但有时候却不是。就算进行了这个对话,你真能达到目的吗?6. Don't ruminate about worst-case scenarios. It's tempting to imagine every possible way a conversation could go – each worse than the last. But this usually isn't helpful. I have a strong tendency to do this, and never once in my experience has the conversation unfolded with any resemblance to what I imagined. It sometimes goes just as poorly as I'd feared, but never in a way that I'd predicted. So unless you're doing constructive strategizing, don't allow yourself to indulge in negative fantasies.不要反复考虑最坏的情况。人们总是忍不住设想谈话的各种情形,这些情形一个比一个糟。但是通常这一点用也没有。我也有强烈的倾向去做这些设想,但据我经验来看,实际的对话和我想象中的从来不一样。有时候,它如同我原来害怕的那么糟糕,可绝不是我预测中的那种情形。所以,除非你在做建设性的规划,否则别让自己沉溺于消极幻想当中。7. In direct conflict with the above tip -- it can nevertheless be useful to ask yourself, "What's the very worst that could happen?" Someone could tell you "No," or laugh in your face, or cry, or yell, or talk about you behind your back. Are these outcomes really so dful? Often, bluntly considering the worst-case scenario is actually reassuring. But do this in a focused, realistic, limited way. Don't spend hours playing out horrible scenes in your mind.和前面一条直接矛盾的是——问问自己:“最坏可能发生的是什么?”这还是有用的。有的人会对你说“不”,或当着你的面大笑、哭、大叫,或背后指点。这些结果真的那么令人恐惧吗?往往考虑出最糟糕的情况反倒使你放心。但是,在问自己这个问题时要集中注意力,要现实,有限度。不要花长时间地在脑子里播放恐怖的画面。8. Can it wait? If you're reacting to something that has just happened, can you postpone the confrontation for a day or two? You might well feel calmer after some time has passed, and even if you still need to have the conversation, you might be able to broach it more productively.能等等再说吗?如果你正处于对刚发生的事情产生的反应中,你能把这次交涉推迟一、两天吗?也许等上一段时间后你会感觉更加镇定些,即便你还需要进行那次谈话,这么做也许能让你更有成效。9. Use notes. When you're emotionally overwrought, it can be hard to remember exactly what was said. If your boss made criticisms of your work, what EXACTLY did he or she say? If you're at the doctor's office, what EXACTLY did the doctor say? In some cases, like going to the doctor, you may even want to bring another person with you to help process information. You might also want to bring notes to have a list of the points to cover. You might be so eager to end the conversation that you'd rush out of the room too soon, or you might forget everything you wanted to say or ask in the heat of the conversation.做记录。在情绪过度劳累时,要准确地记住说过的话往往会很难。如果你的老板批评了你的工作,他/她到底对你说了什么?如果你在医生办公室,医生确切地对你说了什么?有些时候,例如看大夫,你也许会希望有一个人陪你去,以帮助消化信息。也许你还希望带上笔记本,列出谈话要点。在一次激烈的谈话种,你可能会很渴望结束谈话,从而会过早地冲出房间,结果忘记了本来要说的、要问的。10. Write a note instead of having a conversation. When writing, you can pick your words exactly, and by communicating that way, you allow the other person to react privately, with time for reflection. Or you can write a note alerting the person to the fact that a painful conversation is necessary.用留言代替交谈。在书写时,你能准确地选择词语,而且以这个方式交流,你能让别人有考虑的时间来私底下做出反应。还能写留言来警告某人,进行一次痛苦的对话必不可少。11. It sounds simplistic, but if you know you're going to broach a difficult subject on a particular day, get plenty of sleep and exercise in the period before. Feeling energetic, well-rested, and calm in body will put you in better spirits.这一条听上去太简单了。如果你知道某一天你将提出困难的话题,那么之前你需要充分睡眠和锻炼。拥有充沛的精力、良好的休息还有镇定的身体会让你心情愉快。Obviously, the tips aren't universally applicable. You wouldn't take notes when confronting your teenager, and you wouldn't bring your spouse to your performance review. But by thinking constructively about how to broach a difficult subject, you might make it less painful and more productive, for everyone.显然,以上建议并不是所有情况下都通用。面对自己十来岁的孩子时,你可不会做笔记。你也不会带配偶去参加面试。但是,通过建设性地去考虑如何提出一个困难话题,你也许为每个人减少了谈话的痛苦,增加了谈话的成果。 /200902/62002

Feeling stressed or anxious at an inability to access the Internet? Don't worry, you're not alone and now there's a word for it: "discomgoogolation."Nearly half of Britons -- 44 percent -- are discomgoogolation sufferers, according to a survey, with over a quarter -- 27 percent -- admitting to rising stress levels when they are unable to go online."The proliferation of broadband has meant for the first time in history we've entered a culture of 'instant answers,"' said psychologist Dr David Lewis, who identified discomgoogolation by measuring heart rates and brainwave activity.The term comes from "discombobulate," which means to confuse or frustrate, and Google."A galaxy of information is just a mouse click away and we have become addicted to the web," added Lewis. "When unable to get online, discomgoogolation takes over."It was surprising to see the stress this led to brain activity and blood pressure in participants both increase in response to being cut off from the Internet."The survey also found 76 percent of Britons could not live without the Internet, with over half of the population using the web between one and four hours a day and 19 percent of people spending more time online than with their family in a week.Forty-seven percent of those polled believed the Internet was more important in people's lives than religion, with one in five people paying the Internet more attention than their partner.Commissioned by information service 118118, the YouGov poll questioned 2,100 Britons during the first week of July. 上不了网就会觉得焦躁不安?别担心,你并不是个特例,如今很多人都有这种“谷歌依赖症(discomgoogolation)”。据一项调查显示,近一半的英国人(44%)患有“谷歌依赖症”,超过四分之一的人(27%)承认自己在无法上网时会感到压力增大。心理学士大卫#8226;刘易斯说:“宽带网络的普及让人们有史以来首次进入了一个‘速答’文化时代。”刘易斯士通过测量人的心率和脑波变化识别“谷歌依赖症”。“Discomgooglation”一词是“discombobulate”(混乱、丧气)和Google(搜索引擎“谷歌”)两个词的合成。刘易斯说:“如今,你只要轻轻一点鼠标,无数资讯就尽在眼前,我们已经对网络产生了依赖,一旦上不了网,就会感到坐立不安。”“没想到上不了网产生的压力竟然会引起人大脑活动的加速和血压升高。”此外,调查发现,76%的英国人称自己离开网络活不下去,超过一半的人每天的上网时间为一至四个小时,19%的人每周上网的时间比与家人共处的时间还要多。47%的受访者认为,在生活中网络的意义大于宗教信仰;五分之一的人对网络的关注多于自己的伴侣。受118118信息务台的委托,英国YouGov民意调查机构在7月的第一周共对2100位民众进行了调查。 /200809/49807

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