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来源:城市活动    发布时间:2019年11月22日 08:07:09    编辑:admin         

A man called a lawyer and asked, “How much would you charge me to answer three questions?”有个人打电话给律师,问道:“你回答三个问题的收费是多少钱?”律师回答说:“四百美元。”The lawyer said, “0 dollars!”And the man said, “That’s a lot of money, isn’t it?”The lawyer said, “I guess so. What’s your third question?”这个人说:“这要不少钱,不是吗?”律师回答说:“我想是吧!你的第三个问题是什么?” /201305/239328。

“十一”带你走进“西藏江南”Nyingchi becoming first stop for tourists to TibetNyingchi in the southeast of China's Tibet Autonomous Region is becoming the first stop for domestic and overseas tourists to the mysterious autonomous region.With an average altitude of 3,100 meters, Nyingchi has received 199,159, or nearly one third of all the tourists to Tibet, and made a revenue of 79.66 million yuan in the first five months of this year, 20 percent and 24 percent higher than the respective figures for the corresponding period last year, said local tourism bureau.Zhang Yang, a tourist from Southwest China's Yunnan Province, believed that as Nyingchi's altitude is relatively lower than other parts of the region, "tourists can adapt to plateau condition gradually before touring to other areas of Tibet."The Nyingchi airport, which began operation on September 1, 2006, has contributed a lot to the boost of tourism in the prefecture.Surrounded by mountains with average altitude of more than 4,000 meters, the Nyingchi airport has handled 53,000 tourists to Tibet by September this year, despite its location that makes flights more difficult and restricts theairworthy time to only 100 days a year.Altitudes of the other two civil airports in Tibet, located in the regional capital Lhasa and Xigaze, were measured at 3,650 meters and 3,836 meters respectively.Nyingchi Prefecture, covering 117,000 square kilometers, is known for its humid and mild climate, charming scenery and rich natural resources.During the upcoming week-long National Day holiday, Nyingchi is expected to receive about 350,000 tourists, according to local tourism bureau.(Xinhua) 位于西藏自治区东南部的林芝县正成为海内外游客进藏的第一站。林芝平均海拔3100米,据当地旅游局介绍,今年1月至5月,林芝共接待游客199159人次,占进藏游客的近三分之一,旅游总收入达7699万元,分别比去年同期增长了20%和24%。一位名叫张杨的云南游客说,与西藏其它地区相比,林芝的海拔相对较低,因此“游客前往其它地区之前,可以在这过渡一下,逐步适应高原环境。”去年9月1日,林芝机场正式通航,极大促进了当地旅游业的发展,林芝机场的周围都是平均海拔达四千多米的高山峻岭,尽管地势险峻、飞行困难,全年的适航时间仅有100天,但截至今年9月,林芝机场已安全运送游客53000人次。西藏其它两个民用机场位于西藏自治区的首府拉萨和日喀则,海拔分别为3650米和3836米。林芝地区总面积为11万7千平方公里,气候宜人、景色优美、自然资源丰富。据当地旅游局介绍,“十一”国庆黄金周期间,林芝预计将接待约35万名游客。 /200803/30011。

Do you know what to do when the lens points to you? It’s notall about flashing a smile and hoping for the best. And there’s noone who knows that better than celebrities. After mugging it formillions of flash bulbs—including plenty of shots at this year’sNew York Fashion Week—they’ve learned a thing or two aboutlooking good in pictures, and now they’re sharing their lessonswith you。当镜头对着你时你知道该做什么吗?这不是露出一丝微笑然后期待最好的效果就行了的。没有谁比明星更知道这些了。经过数以百万计的闪光灯的历练,包括今年纽约时装周的大量摄像镜头,他们多少知道如何使照片中的自己更美,现在他们正与您分享着经验。Rebecca Romijn;Sometimes you have to fake confidence, posture, or a smile—fake it until you make it!;丽贝卡#8226;罗梅恩“有时候你不得不假装出信心、姿势或一个微笑,假装这些直到你做到最好!”Brad Goreski;Posing is an actual art form. You can give a really great dress to a girl, and if they don’t know howto pose in it, the dress falls dead. If the dress has an open neckline and a plunging back then yougive them the surprise over-the-shoulder. For me personally, I try to give smiles and no smiles. Ithink it’s good for them to give steely, sexy, sensual, and then just a happy smile.;布拉德#8226;戈雷斯基“摆姿势是一门真实的艺术形式。你可以给某个女孩一件漂亮礼,但如果她们不知道穿着它如何摆姿势,那这件礼就会黯然失色。如果一件礼领口大开且露出后背,然后你在肩以上部位给他们惊喜。就我个人而言,我试着微笑或者不笑,我觉得对他们来说在给出坚毅、性感、感性之后,来一个快乐的笑容这是很好的。Katharine McPhee;I try to stand up as straight as I can. I have really broad shoulders, and the straighter I stand, themore of an hourglass shape it gives me.;凯瑟琳#8226;麦菲“我试着尽可能得站直,我有很宽阔的肩膀,我站得越直,它就会使我的身体像沙漏那样拥有更多的性感。”Shay Mitchell;Work it! Have fun. Don#39;t be nervous. If you#39;re laughing and you have a genuine smile, there#39;s nobad photo you can take. My favorite pose is the arm out on the hip. Have your face a little bittitled—I don’t like to face straight on. Chin up, and you’re good to go.;薛#8226;米契尔“努力吧!享受快乐。不要紧张。如果你在大笑,而且笑得很真诚,那么你拿到的照片就没有不好的。我最喜欢的姿势是手插在臀部。让你的脸有一点点倾斜——我不喜欢直直地面对。抬起头,你就可以了。”Maria Menounos;When you stand next to someone, stand straight, and lift your head.;玛丽娅#8226;曼努诺斯“当你站在别人旁边,站直并抬起你的头。Megan HiltyKeep breathing—don#39;t be so stiff!;梅根#8226;希尔提“保持呼吸,不要这么僵硬!”Miranda Cosgrove;Wear something you feel really comfortable in.;米兰达#8226;卡斯格拉夫“穿一些你感觉相当舒的衣。”Debra Messing;Shoulders back. That#39;s huge! It just completely makes everything look taller and better.;黛拉#8226;梅辛“不要耸肩,这事关重大!就这完全可以让一切看起来更高、更好。”Karina Smirnoff;Three things: Blot your face so you’re not as shiny. Use excessive hairspray because if the carpetis outside, it seems to always blow the wrong way. And, last but not least, wear less makeup ratherthan more. Because when you go into pictures with more makeup, it just looks like a mess.;卡琳娜#8226;斯莫诺夫“三件事:把脸弄干净那么你就不会有油光。多用点发胶,因为如果红毯在外面,那么头发似乎总会被吹乱。最后但同等重要的是,少化妆而不是多化一点,因为当你妆很浓的时候去照相,它看起来就一团糟。”Nikki Reed;I#39;m always nervous on a red carpet, when there#39;s a thousand paparazzi standing there takingphotos. I#39;ll forget that I was supposed to pose in a certain way, so I don#39;t really know what myadvice would be, other than to just be yourself!;妮基#8226;瑞德“在红毯上我总是很紧张,当有一千仔站在那里拍照,我就会忘记我该怎样摆姿势,所以我真的不知道我的建议是什么,除了做你自己!” /201308/250869。

If you haven’t seen the work of Robert Harvey Oshatz, then you’re in for a huge treat, because he’s our only guest here at Offbeat today. He’s that cool. He gets the whole day. Although really he’s so cool he should get the month. But I digress.Oshatz has designed many an amazing structure in my home state - Oregon and in other areas as well, as far reaching as Japan. His work is a mix of commercial, residential, religious, and more. What I love is how his work is entirely unique yet somehow manages to fit into the landscape so well - which is crucial I think if we want to preserve the natural environment. We really need to see more often that landscape and structure can ease together.His design philosophy is really bold. Here’s a clip:“Except for the basic elements of design composition, dominance, transition, and identity; I stay away from design theories. They seem to be too transitory and irrelevant to my work. Design theories tend to outshine their author’s performance, becoming limiting concepts, prejudicing the mind while tying one’s hands behind one’s back. They are roadblocks to new ideas. While subscribing to a particular theory of design an architect must solve problems within the parameters of that theory; this is limiting at best…The requirements of architecture are such that I must go beyond what the client understands. There must be surprise, mystery, beauty and delight, elements that make architecture rewarding to its users for a lifetime. This is one of the primary differences between architecture and building. It is the architect’s responsibility to go beyond the mere program and into the realm of what I call the spiritual.”You should really Oshatz’s entire design approach though, not simply the clip above. It’s great, very interesting when combined with his work.I ran into some issues deciding which homes to show. I’ll show two houses today, but narrowing it down to two was very difficult. I love many of his residential works a lot. Being a fan of Oregon in general, I did decide to go with two Oregon homes, which narrowed it down a little.First up the Wilkinson Residence. This is not a house easily captured in photos. However, it’s lovely and offbeat all the same. Located in Portland the home’s lot is a fast sloping grade which according to Oshatz’s site, “Provided the opportunity to bring the main level of the house into the tree canopy to evoke the feeling of being in a tree house.” The client wanted a home that flowed with the natural environment, and I’m thinking that said client got their wish. Take a look:It sort of makes you gasp, no? I almost can’t stop looking at it. This next photo is my favorite picture of the home. It’s the entryway, but it resembles a kaleidescope somewhat - like the flow keeps going when you look right at the circles. 还没见过罗伯特·哈维·奥赫兹的作品吗?那你今天就大饱眼福了,因为奥赫兹将作客“不规则的房屋”一整天哦。他太酷了,按理说他应该呆这一个月我们才甘心。不过,我跑题喽。奥赫兹在我的家乡――俄勒冈州留下了大量令人惊叹的作品,当然也在其它地方了,甚至远如日本。他的建筑是商业,居家,宗教以及更多其它元素的结合。不过,我最爱的是他的与众不同,还有建筑与周围景色完美的和谐,这样的和谐我认为在保护自然时至关重要。我们真的希望看到更多的建筑能与周围景色亲密的相处。他的设计理念非常大胆,看看他怎么说:“除了最基本的创作理论,如设计布局,主导,过渡以及特性,我拒斥理论,一种短暂而且跟我的作品毫不相干的东西。设计理论只会喧宾夺主,取代设计本身的位置,成为一种桎梏,一种概念,甚至一种偏见,使设计者束手缚脚,难以腾挪。理论是创意的绊脚石。一个建筑家一旦束缚于一个设计理论,他看问题就局限于它,理论带给他的只有局限,仅此而已。在设计作品时,我必须超越客户的想象力。惊喜,神秘,美,愉悦是我的建筑给与他们终身受用的体验,缺一不可。这就是建筑和建筑物最本质的区别。一个建筑师不应把建筑本身看作一项工程或任务,他应该进入一种境界,就是我所说的灵魂。”你最好还是把奥赫兹的设计理念通读一遍,比上面的节选要丰富多了。真的很棒,结合他自己的作品来阐释,很有趣。在决定该秀他的哪些作品时,我碰到了麻烦。今天计划是两间私人房屋,但只选两个真是太难抉择了,因为他那些住宅建筑,我喜欢的太多了。不过,我喜欢俄勒冈,所以决定选两间他在俄勒冈的作品,这样范围稍为缩小。第一个当然是威尔金森豪宅了,不过照片很难展现它的精妙。不过,它真的是无比的惹人喜爱,而且是货真价实的不规则哦。座落在波特兰的一个很陡峭的斜坡上,奥赫兹说:“这个斜坡是恰到好处,刚好可以把屋顶设计成树荫状,唤起人在树屋里的感觉。”主人要求屋子与自然环境和谐融洽,我想奥赫兹不负所托。 /200808/45579。

Chew Your Food SlowlyPeople who consume food more slowly—and ignore those “I’m hungry” urges—eat less overall than those who devour their meals. Research has found that impatient people are more likely to be overweight, possibly because of their inability to delay gratification at the dinner table. This practice can help you in other areas of life as well: By eating slowly, you can train yourself to be less impulsive and more patient in general.细嚼慢咽那些细嚼慢咽且不理会“我饿了”欲望的人总体上比那些狼吞虎咽的人吃得少。研究发现不耐烦的人更容易超重,可能是因为他们在餐桌上无法延长满足。这一练习也可以在生活的其它领域帮到你:通过慢慢吃,大体上你可以训练自己少些冲动多些耐心。Experience Different CulturesWhen you travel the world, you find out that many cultures aren’t as punctual and perfectionistic as ours, and encountering those perspectives can mellow you. To work on your patience closer to home, try visiting an area populated by people of a different culture (such as a city’s Chinatown) or take part in a festival held by an immigrant community.体验不同文化当你周游世界时,你会发现很多文化不像我们的文化那样守时和完美主义,遭遇这些观念可以使你成熟。要在离家更近的地方磨练你的耐心,就去尝试探访居住着不同文化人群的地区 (如一个城市中的唐人街)或参加移民社区举办的节日。Laugh at YourselfI’m a newspaper columnist and my husband is a politician, so both of us must be willing to converse with strangers when we’re eating out or shopping for groceries. In the rare moments when people are obnoxious (like the time a woman told me that I needed to get Botox), I can get impatient. But instead of being rude to the person, I formulate a joke, usually at my own expense.自嘲我是一名报纸的专栏作家,我的丈夫是一名政治家,所以当我们外出吃饭或买杂货时,我们俩必须愿意与陌生人交谈。在人们令人讨厌的那样为数不多的时候(就像有次一个女人告诉我需要去打肉毒杆菌),我可以不耐烦。但是除了粗鲁对人,我会编一个笑话,通常是自嘲。Find a DistractionBeing out on the road for weeks on end can certainly test your patience. My wife and I—we drive as a team—have to deal with other drivers and the annoyances of traffic jams, and it’s natural to be anxious in these moments. We overcome that feeling by giving each other something else to think about. For example, my wife tells jokes and catches me up on the latest Facebook posts from friends. Or I’ll talk to my dogs (they also travel with us). Those quick moments of distraction recharge me, and I can again focus on the road without being irritated.找到分心之处在路上连续几周最终一定可以测试你的耐心。我和妻子——我们作为一个团队来开车,不得不与应对其他司机和恼人的交通堵塞,这种时候很自然会焦躁。我们通过让彼此思考其它一些东西来摆脱这种感觉。例如我的妻子会讲笑话,在脸谱网上朋友最新的帖子上了解我的近况。或者我会和我的说话(他们也和我们一起旅行)。那些分心的短暂时刻让我得到休整,我可以不发火地再次集中到路上。Stop Imagining the IdealI often grow impatient when I want to be in control of a situation. To avoid getting antsy when I am writing and can’t find specific words for my thoughts, I try to practice self-compassion. I tell myself that I’m not going to quit even if I become frustrated. I’ll say out loud, “You’re not perfect, but that’s OK. Writing can be a messy process, and it’s not ideal, but you can handle it.” Talking to yourself may feel awkward and goofy, but it quells that feeling of impatience.停止往好处想当我想控制局面时我经常失去耐心。为了避免写作时文思短路的坐立不安,我尝试去实践自我同情。我告诉自己即使受挫我也不会放弃。我会大声说,“你不是完美的,但没关系。写作可以是一个混乱的过程,它不是理想的,但你可以应对它。”与你自己交谈可能会感到尴尬和愚蠢,但它能减轻不耐烦的感觉。 /201304/235494。

Early African American: Jumping the Broom In the times of slavery in this country, African American couples were not allowed to formally marry and live together. To make a public declaration of their love and commitment, a man and woman jumped over a broom into matrimony, to the beat of drums. (The broom has long held significant meaning for the various Africans, symbolizing, the start of home- making for the newlywed couple. In Southern Africa, the day after the wedding, the bride assisted the other women in the family in sweeping the courtyard, indicating her dutiful willing ness to help her in-laws with housework till the newlyweds could move to their new home.) Some African-American couples today are choosing to include this symbolic rite in their wedding ceremony.   Armenia: Two white doves may be released to signify love and happiness. The bride may dress in red silk and may wear cardboard wings with feathers on her head. Small coins may be thrown at her.  早期非洲裔美国人:跳扫帚在美国的黑奴时代,黑人男女是不允许正式结婚生活在一起的。为了向世人宣布他们的爱情和婚约,一对黑人男女和着鼓声的节奏,一起跳过一把扫帚。(扫帚对各种非洲人长期来都具有很重要的意义,因为它意味着新婚夫妇组成家庭的开始。在南部非洲,新娘在婚后的第一天要帮助夫家的其他女性清扫院子,以此表明在住进自己的新家前,她愿意尽职地帮助丈夫的家人承担家务劳动。)直至今日,一些美国黑人还在他们的婚礼上举行这种象征性的仪式。  亚美尼亚:人们放飞两只白鸽,以示爱情和幸福。新娘穿着红色丝绸的装,头戴饰有羽毛的纸翼。人们还可向新娘投掷硬币。  Belgium: The bride may still embroider her name on her handkerchief, carry it on the wedding day, then frame it and keep it until the next family bride marries.  Bermuda: Islanders top their tiered wedding cakes with a tiny sapling. The newlyweds plant the tree at their home, where they can watch it grow, as their marriage grows.  Bohemia: The groom gives the bride a rosary, a prayer book, a girdle with three keys (to guard her virtue), a fur cap, and a silver wedding ring. The bride gives the groom a shirt sewn with gold th blended with colored silks and a wedding ring. Before the ceremony, the groomsman wraps the groom in the bride‘s cloak to keep evil spirits from creeping in and dividing their two hearts.  比利时:新娘可以将其姓名绣在手帕上,在婚礼举行日随身带上它。婚礼后将手帕装入镜框保存,直到家里的另外一个姑娘结婚。  百慕大:百慕大岛民在他们的多层婚礼蛋糕的顶层插上一株小树苗,新婚夫妇要将这株树苗种在家中,这样他们可以目睹树苗伴随着他们的婚姻一起长大。  波黑人:新郎向新娘赠送一串念珠,一本祈祷文,一根上面串着三把钥匙的腰带(用以保护她的贞洁),一顶毛皮帽,一个银的结婚戒指。新娘则向新郎赠送一件用金线和色丝绸缝制的衬衣和结婚戒指。婚礼前,伴郎将新郎裹进新娘的斗篷里,以防恶魔侵入,拆散他们相爱的心。  Caribbean: A rich black cake baked with dried fruits and rum is especially popular on the islands of Barbados, Grenada and St. Lucia. The recipe, handed down from mother to daughter, is embellished by each. It is considered a "pound" cake--with the recipe calling for a pound each of flour, dark brown sugar, butter, glace cherries, raisins, prunes, currants, plus a dozen eggs and flavorings. The dried fruits are soaked in rum and kept in a crock anywhere from two weeks to six months.  Croatia: Married female relatives remove the bride‘s veil and replace it with a kerchief and apron, symbols of her new married status. She is then serenaded by all the married women. Following the wedding ceremony, those assembled walk three times around the well (symbolizing the Holy Trinity,) and throw apples into it (symbolizing fertility).  加勒比地区:在巴巴多斯,格林纳达和圣卢西亚,用干果和朗姆酒制作的味道浓郁的蛋糕十分常见。蛋糕的制作方法,由母亲亲手传给女儿,并且各自对其加以修饰。人们把这种蛋糕叫作“一磅”蛋糕,因为制作这种蛋糕需要面粉、棕糖、黄油、糖霜樱桃、葡萄干、李子、红醋栗各一磅,加上一打鸡蛋和调味品。制作蛋糕的干果要在朗姆酒中浸泡并在瓦罐中保存两个星期至6个月。  克罗地亚:由已婚的女性亲戚摘下新娘的面纱,换上一块头巾和一条围裙,意味着新娘的已婚新身份。然后由所有的已婚妇女为新娘唱小夜曲。婚礼之后,所有来宾围绕着井走三圈(象征着圣三位一体),并向井中扔苹果(象征着生育)。  The Czech Republic: Friends would sneak into the bride‘s yard to plant a tree, then deco rate it with ribbons and painted eggshells. Legend said she would live as long as the tree. Brides in the countryside carry on the very old custom of wearing a wreath of rosemary, which symbolizes remembrance. The wreath is woven for each bride on her wedding eve by her friends as a wish for wisdom, love, and loyalty.  Egypt: Families, rather than grooms, propose to the bride. In Egypt, many marriages are arranged. The zaffa, or wedding march, is a musical procession of drums, bagpipes, horns, belly dancers, and men carrying flaming swords; it announces that the marriage is about to begin.  England: Traditionally, the village bride and her wedding party always walk together to the church. Leading the procession: a small girl strewing, blossoms along the road, so the bride‘s path through life will always be happy and laden with flowers. /200803/29060。

It was 7:30 a.m., and I was groggily pulling on a bathrobe when the doorbell rang.当时是清晨七点半。一听到门铃响,我便迷迷糊糊裹上了一件浴袍。#39;Who could that be?#39; I murmured to my husband.“那会是谁呢?”我向丈夫呢喃道。#39;It#39;s the painters,#39; he answered, darting downstairs to open the door. I soon heard him chatting with them in Spanish on the front porch. That#39;s when I really woke up.“是油漆工”,他一边冲下楼去开门一边说。不久我就听见他和油漆工们在前面门廊用西班牙语交谈。那时,我才真正从梦乡中醒来。#39;The painters? For our house?#39; I called down the stairs incredulously. Alejandro and I had been talking about painting the exterior of the house for over a month. We had looked at color charts, painted sample patches and narrowed down the choices. But we were still completing the plan.“油漆工?来刷我们的房子?”我冲楼下大喊,觉得难以置信。一个多月以来,亚历杭德罗(Alejandro)和我一直都在谈论房屋外观的刷漆问题。我们一起看了比色图表和刷好的样品,并缩小了选择范围。但我们仍在完善这个计划的过程中。By the time he came back inside, I was furious.等他回到房间时,我已是怒不可遏了。#39;Why are painters aly here? We don#39;t know the accent colors! We haven#39;t sketched it out! We didn#39;t run it by my sister!#39; I complained.“为什么油漆工现在就来了?我们连主色调是什么都不知道!我们还没有把草图画出来!我们还没让我的过目呢!”我抱怨道。#39;We#39;ll get started and figure it all out as we go,#39; Alejandro said. #39;It#39;s time to make it happen.#39;“我们就要动工了,在这个过程中,我们会把所些问题都一一解决的。”亚历杭德罗说,“该是开工的时候了。”I was mad all day long: Painting our house is part of our investment in it and ought to be a mutual decision, I fumed. But that evening when I got home and took a look at the painters#39; progress, it was suddenly easy to figure out where the trim color should go and what color the door should be. I tried to defend my morning hysteria, saying we had not technically been y to pull the trigger on the project, but my argument fell apart in light of how well it was working out.我一整天都气鼓鼓的。刷房子是我们对房产投资的一部分,这应该是两个人共同的决定,我十分恼火。但那天晚上,当我回家看到油漆工的进展时,突然觉得不费吹灰之力便能说出门该上什么色、哪些地方该刷配色。但我还是试着为自己早上歇斯底里的行为辩解。我说,严格说来,我们并未准备好动工。但由于刷漆工程进展得异常顺利,我的此番争论因而完全站不住脚。#39;Maybe you could even say…I was right?#39; he asked, teasingly, hopefully.“也许你甚至可以说……我是对的?”亚历杭德罗揶揄道。他对我的态度发生转变仍抱有希望。I answered with a mock cry of horror, as though he had asked me to curse my children. I love the man, but really. What a suggestion.我对他的话报以一阵恐怖的假哭干嚎,就好像他要我诅咒自己的孩子一样。但我爱这个男人,是真爱。让我承认他是对的,这是多好的一个建议。***---In a democratic system like our marriage, where two parties enjoy a 50-50 split in voting rights, it#39;s uncomfortable when one party designates himself or herself the dictator and makes a decree. I#39;ve always prided myself on being part of a marriage of equals, where we are both the bwinners and, as I like to tenderly remind the South American gentleman to whom I am wed, we are both responsible for the housework. We also both handle the banking, bill paying and investment decisions.当身处我们的婚姻这样一种民主制度中时,双方在投票表决权上各占一半,如果其中有一方(他或她)自封为独裁者并作出一个裁定,这就会让另一个人不快。一直以来,我都为自己是这段平等婚姻中的一份子而感到自豪。我们两个人都在赚钱养家,同时我也喜欢温柔地提醒我丈夫──娶我的这位南美绅士──两个人都应该承担一些家务。而在事务、账单付和投资决策方面,我们俩也是有商有量。But as illustrated by the #39;paint-gate#39; episode, sometimes it really doesn#39;t work to wait around for consensus to take hold. Sometimes you need to designate a trigger man to execute the final decision. And sometimes─and this is where it gets complicated─we need to assign ourselves that role and simply take over.但回到我刚刚提的“刷门”事件上,你会发现,有时候想要达成共识,光空等着根本就行不通。有时你需要指派一位“扣动扳机的男人”来作出最终的决定。还有一些时候──这种情况就很复杂了──我们需要自封为这个角色并坦然接受。In retrospect, I realize I did this a few years ago after our kids were born and I felt strongly that we did not have enough life insurance. For Alejandro it was a nonissue: None of his Uruguayan friends or family have life insurance, which he considered a symptom of Yankee neurosis. Getting insurance for myself was easy enough, but it felt awkward to demand that Alejandro take out a policy on himself. Combine that with the fact that when I can#39;t sleep, I watch those true-crime TV shows that are inevitably about one spouse who knocked off the other for the insurance money.回忆往事,我发觉自己在几年前就曾这样做过。那是在我们的孩子出生后,我强烈地感到一家人的人寿保险缴得不够多。而对亚历杭德罗来说,这根本就不是个问题:他在乌拉圭的家人朋友统统都没有人寿保险,所以在他看来,这完全是美国佬的神经质症状。要我为自己买一份保险是小事一桩,但如果要求亚历杭德罗也这么做会让我觉得尴尬为难。还有,那就是我在睡不着的时候会看一些根据真人真事拍的犯罪电视节目,那里面必然会上演这样的剧情:夫妻中的一方为了吞掉配偶的保险金而出手干掉对方。However, it was my absolute certainty that life insurance was essential that motivated him. Now we both have policies, and we both feel better for having them.尽管如此,我还是百分百确定,人寿保险对他来说必不可少且至关重要。正是这种坚定,促使我让他上了保险。现在我们俩都投了保,这也让我们感觉更好。One party having that total confidence that this is the right thing to do is, I believe, the first requirement for decree-making. It relates to the second requirement, which is a willingness to take responsibility for the consequences. It#39;s not always possible to completely mitigate the impact after the fact, but it#39;s important to let your spouse know you understand it will be your job to clean up any mess.我认为,作出独裁决定的首要前提就是:一方须完全确信自己要做的事是对的。而这又与第二个前提息息相关,那就是愿意为一切后果承担责任。虽然事后不可能完全消除所有的影响,但有一点很重要,就是要让你的伴侣知道,你非常清楚残局要归你来收拾。I got an opportunity last week to exercise some of my new theories on decree-making when we needed to clear out space in our garage, which we are converting to a guesthouse. I suggested selling our unneeded stuff on Craigslist.上周,就在我们需要清空车库、准备将其变成一间客房的时候,我得到了一个能将我自创的“独裁决定新理论”付诸实践的机会。我建议将家里用不上的东西放到在线分类网站Craigslist上出售。Alejandro was negative about Craigslist, arguing that he didn#39;t want strangers stopping by the house and that the payoff would be too small for the work of posting ads and fielding calls. At first, I let the items sit while we mentioned them to friends, hoping we might somehow luck into a taker.而亚历杭德罗却一口否决了在Craigslist上卖旧物的想法,他争辩说不想让陌生人到家里来,而且跟刊登广告和接答电话的工作付出相比,卖东西的所得太少了。一开始,我依了他,就将物品闲置在家里,但向朋友们宣传了旧物出售的消息,希望就这样靠运气,没准儿会寻来买家。Finally, I decided this was silly: I knew selling them on Craigslist was the right thing to do, and I was willing to do the work of vetting calls and receiving customers. A week later, our garage was empty and we were a few hundred dollars richer. Alejandro can hardly remember why he didn#39;t like the Craigslist idea and is happy to have been overruled.但最终,我觉得这种方式太愚蠢了:我知道把它们放在Craigslist上出售才是正确的事情,我也愿意去做筛选来电和接待买家的工作。一周以后,车库就被清空了,我们的手头也多出了几百美金。现在,亚历杭德罗很难想起自己当初为什么不喜欢在Craigslist上卖东西的主意,他也乐于接受自身建议被否决的事实。And, oddly enough, that#39;s how I feel about the house paint and some other decisions that my beloved temporary dictator has unilaterally imposed.说来也怪,在刷房子和其他一些由我心爱的临时独裁者单方面敲定的事情上,我也颇有同感。I may even work my way up to saying #39;you were right.#39; But first let#39;s see how the house looks when the paint dries.也许,我会争取说一声“你是对的。”但在这之前,先让我们等油漆干了,瞧瞧房子的模样再说吧。 /201305/242252。