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2019年12月10日 23:57:24 | 作者:99知识 | 来源:新华社
You only have 90 seconds, so the important point here is the #39;first impression#39;. Below is a list of quick and easy steps which will get people to like you。你只有90秒的时间,所以最重要的莫过于“第一印象”。下面是一些快捷简单的步骤能让别人迅速喜欢你。1.Compliment them。夸赞他们The easiest, quickest way to get someone to like you almost instantly is by complimenting them. I#39;m sure we have all experienced that even the smallest of compliments can make our day. Compliment them on what they are wearing (;What a beautiful dress you have, it really suits you;) or something that they#39;ve done (;Hey that#39;s a really clever way to tie your shoelaces, I#39;ll have to try that next time;). This works because naturally, it is hard to dislike someone who is saying nice things about you。让别人喜欢你最简单最快捷的方法莫过于夸赞她们。我相信每个人都体验过一个小夸奖能让我们开心一整天的时刻。夸赞他们的衣着(你今天穿的裙子好好看啊,真的很适合你),或是他们做了些什么(这么系鞋带真的很好诶,我下次也要试试)。这个会非常自然,伸手不打笑脸人呀。2. Smile。微笑Smiling makes you look friendly, approachable and cheerful. These are qualities that people generally like to associate themselves with。微笑会让你看起来非常友好,容易接近,更快乐。这些特质都让别人乐于和你接触。3. Eye contact and body language。眼神交流和肢体语言This is important to show that you are polite and respectful. Make sure you make eye contact with the person you are speaking to and keep your body language open. For example, don#39;t keep looking at the ground or staring into space, or talk with your arms crossed. This will make you look rude and unapproachable。眼神交流和肢体语言。要显示出你的礼貌和尊敬,这一点至关重要。确保和别人说话时有眼神交流,别忘了加一点肢体语言进去。比如,不要总是东看西看或者盯着空白处,或是交叉双臂与人交流。这只会让你看起来十分粗鲁和不易接近。4. Ask questions。问问题When engaged in a conversation with someone, be sure to ask them questions about themselves. People generally like to talk about themselves, so it is fairly easy to get people to like you by being a good listener and taking interest in what they are saying. On the other hand, make sure you bring up some interesting things about yourself as well, to keep the conversation open and reciprocal。和别人交谈时,别忘了问一些关于他们自身的问题。人们都乐于去谈论自己,所以要想别人喜欢你,不如当一个好的倾听者,对他们谈论的话题感兴趣。另外,确保你能从自身引发出一些有意思的东西,使得这个话题可以一直继续下去。5. Know their name。知道他们的名字If you are meeting someone for the first time, it is assumed that within the first 90 seconds you will get their name. Remember it, and use it. At the end of the meeting, say your goodbyes but make sure to use their name, as it makes it more personal (;It was lovely to meet you Grace, hope to see you again soon;)。知道他们的名字。如果你第一次和别人见面,最好能在最初的90秒之内记住他们的名字。记住,叫出来。见面结束之后,喊出他们的名字说再见,这会更亲密哦(“Grace,认识你真开心,希望下次能快速见面”)。6. When in conversation, try to talk only about good or positive things。谈话过程中,尽力只去说好的积极的事情These are a lot more pleasant to hear than negative things. Talk about what you like or enjoy doing, your hobbies and special interests. Try not to badmouth anything or talk about your dislikes, because if you only have 90 seconds and are going on first impressions, you don#39;t want the other person to think you have a pessimistic view of life。谈话过程中,尽力只去说好的积极的事情。这比听那些消极的事情要舒多了。说说你喜欢什么,喜欢干什么,你的乐趣和特殊的兴趣。不要总是大嘴巴的去谈论你不喜欢什么,要知道你只有90秒的时间来留下第一印象,你也不希望别人对你的评价是悲观厌世吧。7. Dress appropriately。合适的穿着People judge on first impressions (and this includes your clothes) so make sure you dress appropriately for where you are. Nobody likes to see someone in home clothes at a fancy restaurant or someone with make up caked on their face at the gym。第一印象对人们而言至关重要(包括你的衣),所以确保你的衣合适当时所在的场合。没有人喜欢在高级餐厅看到别人穿着睡衣或者是在健身房看到别人画着妆出现。 /201507/388630US brain surgeon Dr. Steve Carr decided he#39;d propose to his girlfriend by burying the ring in the sandy beaches off Naples for his girlfriend to find, MSN reported. But he forgot where he#39;d put the ring.据微软全国广播公司报道,美国一名脑科医生斯蒂夫·卡尔决定在意大利那不勒斯海滩向女友求婚,他将戒指埋在沙子里打算让女友自己把它找出来。不料,他却忘记了埋藏戒指的地点。;We were digging and digging and I thought there was no way we would ever find it,; Ms Naam said.他的女友娜姆称:“我们一直在挖啊挖,可是我认为戒指永远都不会找到了。”Ms Naam accepted the proposal and said the ring would ;never leave my finger again;.最后,娜姆接受了求婚,并表示戒指“永远都不会再离开我的手指了”。 /201206/185672

Cowl necks tend to be a flattering look on tall women—the draping fabric highlights the long neck while drawing attention toward the face. For this reason alone, all tall women should pick up at least one infinity-style cowl neck scarf. You can throw it on over any top or blouse to add extra warmth while still drawing attention to your best assets. 套头领已经逐渐成为高个儿女性的新宠—网式织物让女性的脖子部分成为闪光点,同时又让脸部成为了关注焦点。正因如此,所有高个儿女性都应该至少拥有一款永恒风格的套头围巾。你可以把它搭配在任何衣或衬衫上,这样会在带给你额外温暖的同时还把注意力吸引到你最好的资产上。 /201110/158726

When you look back on yourself in the past – 10, 20, 30 or more years ago – it’s surprising to see how much you have changed over time. Your experiences, your friends, your family and your work have all shaped who you are right now. But where will you be in another few years? How will you have changed? Reflective writing in your journal is an excellent way to think about what you want out of the future.当你10年、20年或更多年后回顾过去时,你会吃惊地发现,随着时光的流逝,你也发生了很大的变化。你的经历、朋友、家庭和工作造就了现在的你。但是再过几年你会在哪里呢?你会如何变化呢?这样反思性的写作,会是思考未来你想要什么的一种好的方式。You may have aly written a letter to your younger self before, conveying all the wisdom and perspective you wish you had had at the time. Now consider the opposite end of the spectrum; what would you say if you wrote your future self a letter?你也许以前试过给过去的自己写信,向年轻时的自己传授一些人生的智慧和观点,你希望那时候的自己就能知道这些。现在我们换个角度看问题,如果让你给未来的自己写封信,你会写点什么?Just imagine writing a letter to your future self 5 years from now, then opening it at that exact moment 5 years down the road to see how much of it resonated with you. It is a useful supplementary tool to be used in goal achievement, because when you write the letter to your future self, it helps crystallize exactly how you anticipate yourself to become at that specific moment down the road.想象一下,给5年后的自己写一封信,当5年后你打开那封信时,你会产生多少共鸣。这是实现目标的一种有用的辅助工具,因为当你给未来的自己写信时,你会慢慢理清希望自己在人生旅途的那个特定时刻变成什么样子。As you the letter in the future, you can assess how many things match up (or not) vs. your expectations in the past and think about why that’s the case. Often times, the goals we set and our goal achievement process are subjected to a lot of changes along the way, due to varying obstacles, unanticipated circumstances and changing priorities. The letter gives you a macro-view of your initial vision and lets you recognize how your current vision differs from the past.当你在未来读这封信时,你可以看看有多少事情是像你过去期望的那样,你也会思考为什么会这样。很多时候,我们设定目标在实现的过程中会受到沿途中各种因素的影响,因为会遇到各种各样的困难、各种意外情况并需要不断调整优先级。这封信能让你从宏观的角度上去看自己最初的愿景,让你意识到自己现在的想法和过去相比有多么不同。When you open the letter in the future, you as your future self gets to compare how you used to be in the past and compare with how you are currently. This lets you see in totality how much things have changed since then – and this can be a really intriguing experience. It’s interesting to just see how much you have grown/changed since you wrote the letter.当你以后看信时,你会把过去的自己和现在的自己进行比较。这会让你看清从写信时起你发生了哪些变化,这种体验是非常有趣的。光看看从你写信开始发生了哪些变化就很有趣了。What To Write About写什么内容好呢?Look at today’s date. Now imagine you writing to yourself, exactly X years from now. What do you want to say to your future self?看看今天的日期。现在想象一下你在给X年后的自己写信。你想对未来的自己说些什么呢?How do you want your future self to be like 1 year in the future?你想让自己1年后变成什么样子呢?What are the different dreams and goals you would want to be realized by then?到那时你想实现的梦想和目标会有哪些不同呢?What is your desired status of the areas of your life wheel at that time?那时你想要的人生轨迹和状态会是什么样的呢?Career/Business/Studies? Finances? Family? Friends? Love? Health? Spirituality? Recreation? Personal growth? Contribution?职业/生意/学习?财政?家庭?朋友?爱情?健康?心灵??个人成长?成就?Once you’re done, sign off your name with today’s date. Safe keep your letter. Put the papers in an envelope. Seal it.写完后,别忘了在名字下面写上今天的日期。妥善保管你的信件,把信纸放在信封里,封上信封。Set in your calendar to open your letter 1 year from now. Put this envelope in a safe place where no one can access to it.在日历上注明,1年后的今天你要打开这封信。把这封信放在安全的地方,确保别人看不到。Live your life like you’ve never lived it before in the next 1 year. Open the letter 1 year later and relish in nostalgia, love and joy as you the letter from yourself 1 year ago.在接下来的1年里,好好生活,用崭新的方式过生活。一年后打开信封,在怀旧却又爱意满满的欢乐气氛中享受读信的乐趣。Write Your Letter To Your Future Self给未来的自己写封信Take out a pen and paper right now and start writing your letter to your future self. Identify a time period to write to, imagine how you will be like during that time period, then start writing. Think about the type of person you will be, your place in life, what you would have accomplished then, the kind of thoughts and feelings you will experience, and so on.现在就拿出笔和纸,开始给未来的自己写封信吧。找个合适的时间,想象你在那段时间内会是什么样子,然后开始写信。想一想你想成为哪种人,你在生活中的位置、那时你的成就、你会有什么样的想法和感觉,诸如此类的内容。At the end of the letter, seal it in an envelope, write the date to open it on the cover and put it in a safe storage space. Fix the date to open this letter in your personal calendar. When you open this sometime in the near future, you might gain additional insights about yourself and your journey in the past few years that you were oblivious to.写完信,把它装到信封里,在信封的封面上写上日期,把它妥善保管起来。在自己的日历中标记一下打开这封信的日期。当你以后打开信时,你可能会更好的洞察自己以及自己过去的生命历程。 /201301/219425

Many parents of 20-somethings worry that their offspring haven#39;t yet found a career path, gotten married or become financially independent. 许多20来岁青年的父母忧心忡忡,因为他们的子女还没找到自己的事业之路,还没有结婚,或者还没有在经济上独立。 These parents should chill out, experts say. 专家说,这些家长应该淡定一些。 Recent research into how the brain develops suggests that people are better equipped to make major life decisions in their late 20s than earlier in the decade. The brain, once thought to be fully grown after puberty, is still evolving into its adult shape well into a person#39;s third decade, pruning away unused connections and strengthening those that remain, scientists say. 对大脑发育的最新研究表明,人在20多岁年龄段的后期比前期更具有做出人生重大决定的能力。科学家称,曾被认为在青春期之后就已发育完全的大脑在人生的第三个十年期仍要继续发育,清除掉从未使用过的连接,加强剩余的那部分连接,最终达到成年人大脑的形态。 #39;Until very recently, we had to make some pretty important life decisions about education and career paths, who to marry and whether to go into the military at a time when parts of our brains weren#39;t optimal yet,#39; says neuroscientist Jay Giedd at the National Institute of Mental Health, whose brain-imaging studies of thousands of young people have yielded many of the new insights. Postponing those decisions makes sense biologically, he says. #39;It#39;s a good thing that the 20s are becoming a time for self-discovery.#39; 美国国家心理卫生研究所(National Institute of Mental Health)的神经学家杰伊#12539;吉德(Jay Giedd)说,“直到最近,我们都是在部分大脑尚未发育到最佳状态时就不得不做出涉及教育、事业、结婚对象、是否参军等人生中十分重要的决定。”他对几千名年轻人所做的脑成像研究已经产生了许多新见解。从生物学的角度来说,推迟那些决定是有道理的,他说,“20多岁的年龄段正在成为自我发现的阶段,这是件好事。” Such findings are part of a new wave of research into #39;emerging adulthood,#39; the years roughly from 18 to 29, which psychologists, sociologists and neuroscientists increasingly see as a distinct life stage. The gap between adolescence and full adulthood is becoming ever wider as more young people willingly or because of economic necessity prolong their education and postpone traditional adult responsibilities. As recently as the 1960s, the average age of first marriage for women in the U.S. was 20, and men 22. Today, the average is 26 for women and 28 for men. 这些发现是一股研究“始成年期”的新浪潮的一部分。始成年期大致是指18-29岁之间的时期,心理学家、社会学家和神经学家都逐渐将其视为一个独特的人生阶段。随着越来越多的年轻人或出于自愿或迫于经济原因延长他们的教育,推迟承担传统的成年人责任,青春期和完全成年之间的时间间隔变得越来越大。在时隔不远的20世纪60年代,美国女性初婚的平均年龄是20岁,男性是22岁。今天,女性初婚的平均年龄为26岁,男性为28岁。 #39;It should be reassuring for parents to know that it#39;s very typical in the 20s not to know what you#39;re going to do and change your mind and seem very unstable in your life. It#39;s the norm,#39; says Jeffrey J. Arnett, a professor of psychology at Clark University in Worcester, Mass., who coined the term #39;emerging adulthood#39; in 2000. 马萨诸塞州伍斯特市(Worcester)克拉克大学(Clark University)的心理学教授杰弗里#12539;J#12539;阿内特(Jeffrey J. Arnett)在2000年的时候新造了“始成年期”一词,他说,“人在20多岁时的典型特征是不清楚自己将来要做什么,常改变想法,生活看似很不稳定,家长们如果了解这一点就应该放下心来。” For young adults, it can be a stressful time. High rates of anxiety, depression, motor-vehicle accidents and alcohol use are at their peak from 18 to 25, trends that tend to level out by age 28, studies show. And a recent survey by Clark University, which polled more than 1,000 young adults nationwide, found that 72% said this time of life was stressful and 33% said they were often depressed. Still, 89% believed they would eventually get what they want out of life. 对于刚刚成年的年轻人来说,这可能是一个充满压力的时期。研究表明,焦虑、抑郁、机动车事故和喝酒的比率在18-25岁之间达到高峰,这种态势往往到28岁才趋于平稳。克拉克大学最近对全国1,000多名刚成年的年轻人所做的一项问卷调查发现,72%的人说人生的这一阶段充满压力,33%的人称他们经常感到郁闷。尽管如此,还是有89%的人相信他们最终会得到自己的生活所求。 At age 28, Nikki Cohen has explored more careers than many people do in a lifetime. After a year as a pre-med student at Emory University, the Long Island native moved back to New York to attend Parsons School of Design. #39;I decided fashion was more exciting than science and a little more #39;me,#39; #39; Ms. Cohen says. 28岁的尼基#12539;科恩(Nikki Cohen)对事业的探寻已经比很多人整个一生里所做的还要多。科恩在长岛(Long Island)出生长大,在埃默里大学(Emory University)念了一年医学预科之后,她回到了纽约,进入帕森设计学院(Parsons School of Design)学习。她说,“当时我觉得时装比科学更激动人心,更适合‘我’。” She opened a clothing boutique when she was 23 and starred in a short-lived reality show, #39;Downtown Girls,#39; on MTV. When the show was canceled and her store fell victim to the economic downturn, Ms. Cohen decided she was passionate about health issues after all and is now completing her master#39;s thesis in health education at Columbia University. 23岁时,她开了一家装店,并在MTV短命的真人秀节目《都市女孩》(Downtown Girls)中担任主角。当这个节目被取消、她的商店也受经济衰退所拖累之时,她认为自己终究还是对健康问题感兴趣,现在她正在哥伦比亚大学(Columbia University)撰写健康教育的硕士论文。 #39;It#39;s definitely a scary time,#39; says Ms. Cohen. #39;I#39;m fearful that I#39;m not going to get a job or meet a man that makes me happy for more than a month. But I#39;m also happy that I get to try out different things.#39; 科恩说,“这绝对是个让人提心吊胆的时期,我一直都在担心自己找不到工作,或者遇不到能够让我幸福超过一个月的男人。但是我也很高兴自己尝试了不同的东西。” Researchers are just beginning to study how different experiences in adolescence and young adulthood may impact brain development. In one recent study, Dr. Giedd and his team compared brain images of teenage mothers with teens who hadn#39;t given birth, but the researchers didn#39;t find any clear differences. Yet other studies have found that skills such as playing an instrument or speaking another language are easier for young people whose brain connections are still forming. Adults also can learn new languages, but with more difficulty and often with an accent. 研究人员对青春期和青年期的不同经历如何对大脑发育产生影响的研究正处于起步阶段。在最近的一项研究中,吉德和他的团队把未成年母亲的大脑影像拿来与未生育青少年的大脑影像进行了对比,但是研究人员没有发现任何明显的差异。然而,其他研究已经发现,像弹奏乐器或说另外一种语言这样的技能对大脑连接尚在形成阶段的年轻人来说学起来更容易。成年人也能够学习新的语言,但是难度更大,而且常常带有口音。 The fact that the brain stays unfinished during early adulthood #39;is the best thing that ever happened to humans#39; because it allows us to adapt to changing environments, says Dr. Giedd. #39;We can figure out what kind of world we live in and what we need to be really good at.#39; 吉德说,大脑发育在成年初期尚未完成这一事实“是发生在人类身上最好的事情”,因为它可以让我们适应变化的环境,“我们可以弄清楚自己生活在什么样的世界之中以及自己真正需要什么样的一技之长。” The front part of the brain, called the prefrontal cortex, is one of the last brain regions to mature. It is the area responsible for planning, prioritizing and controlling impulses. 大脑前部称为前额皮质的部分是最后成熟的大脑区域之一。这个区域负责规划、优选和控制神经冲动。 By the late 20s, #39;there#39;s better communication between parts of the brain that process emotions and social information - like what people think of you - and the parts that are important for planning ahead and balancing risk and reward,#39; says developmental psychologist Laurence Steinberg of Temple University. 美国天普大学(Temple University)的发展心理学家劳伦斯#12539;斯坦伯格(Laurence Steinberg)说,到了20岁年龄段的后期,“大脑中处理情感和社交信息──比如人们对你的看法──的部分与大脑中重点负责事先规划、平衡风险与回报的部分之间建立了更好的连接。” How can emerging adults maximize their brain potential in this period? #39;Things that are cognitively stimulating are important,#39; says Dr. Steinberg. #39;Watching talking cats on YouTube isn#39;t as good for cognitive development as ing or taking classes.#39; 处于始成年阶段的年轻人如何才能把他们的大脑潜力发挥到极致呢?斯坦伯格说,“能够提供认知刺激的东西很重要,对认知发展而言,在YouTube上看会说话的猫不如读书或听课。” Even young adults who are financially dependent on their parents can practice independence in other ways. #39;My advice is, if your parents are currently doing things for you that you could do for yourself, take the controls. Say, #39;No. Mom, Let me get my own shampoo,#39; #39; says Jennifer Tanner, a developmental psychologist and co-chair of the Society for the Study of Emerging Adulthood, an academic organization. 就算是那些在经济上还依赖父母的年轻人也可以通过别的方式来锻炼独立的能力。学术机构“始成年期研究协会”的联合主席、发展心理学家詹妮弗#12539;坦纳(Jennifer Tanner)说,“我的建议是,如果家长现在还在替你做你力已能及的事情,你要主动自己去做。你可以说:‘妈妈别管,让我自己拿香波。’” Physically, the body is at its peak during emerging adulthood and the chronic diseases of later adulthood won#39;t start for a while. 从生理上讲,人的身体在始成年期达到巅峰状态,在一段时间之内,成年后期的慢性疾病都不会发生。 The top 10 causes of death in young people - including motor vehicle accidents, homicides and suicides - are all preventable issues relating to judgment, not illness. 年轻人的十大死因──包括机动车事故、他杀和自杀──都是可以预防的问题,牵涉到判断力,与疾病无关。 Adolescent and 20-something brains are also particularly vulnerable to trauma, abuse, alcohol and drugs. Brain scans have shown that heavy drinking, defined as 20 or more drinks a month, in young people can lead to decreased cognitive function, memory and attention. 青少年和20来岁青年的大脑也尤其容易受到心理创伤、虐待、酒精和毒品的侵害。脑部扫描显示,年轻人酗酒(界定标准为一个月喝酒达20瓶及以上)可以导致认知功能、和注意力的减退。 Some 20-somethings also are laying the groundwork for later health problems. About three-quarters of young adults are overweight, raising their risk of later obesity, and about 25% smoke cigarettes. 一些20来岁的年轻人正在为自己以后的健康问题埋下隐患。大约3/4的年轻人体重超标,增加了今后患肥胖病的危险,吸烟的年轻人约占25%。 Some severe mental illnesses also become apparent between ages 15 and 25. Early warning signs of schizophrenia include hallucinations, sudden hostility and suspiciousness, blank stare and incoherent conversation. Bipolar disorder involves cycles of depression with recklessness and impulsivity, such as excessive spending. 一些严重的精神疾病在15-25岁年龄段也开始变得明显起来。精神分裂症的早期征兆包括幻觉、突发敌意与疑心、茫然盯视及说话语无伦次。躁郁症则是在心情抑郁与鲁莽冲动(比如过度消费)之间交替循环。 Parents who suspect their grown children could have a mental-health problem should get an assessment right away. #39;It#39;s extremely complicated even for professionals to parse out what#39;s developmental and what#39;s a mental-health problem in this age period,#39; says Dr. Tanner. #39;If your kid won#39;t go, go yourself and get professional advice. You can#39;t even start working on the developmental stuff if there#39;s a mental-health issue,#39; she says. 怀疑自己的子女可能有心理问题的家长应该立刻带孩子去检查。坦纳说,“即使是专业人员,要分析出这个年龄阶段里哪些属于心理发展问题,哪些属于心理健康问题都是一件极端复杂的事情。如果你的孩子不愿意去,你自己也要去向专业人士咨询建议。如果存在心理健康问题,促进心理发展的所有努力甚至都无从入手。” Rates of depression, anxiety and other mental-health issues are higher in the teens and 20s than in any other decade except the 80s. Some experts blame the roller coaster of change and uncertainty during the youthful years. #39;Most emerging adults find it very exciting to be in this time of life, but some find it overwhelming. They wonder, #39;How do I find out who I am, or what I want to do?#39; Or they want to be a doctor or own a business and they find the doors closed to them,#39; says Dr. Arnett. 除了80多岁年龄段以外,十几岁和二十几岁的人出现抑郁、焦虑和其它心理健康问题的比率比其它任何年龄段的人都高。一些专家认为青年时期过山车式的情绪突变与不确定性造成了这种局面。阿内特说,“大多数始成年期的年轻人发现人生的这一阶段很有刺激性,但是有些人觉得这段时期难以应对。他们想,‘我如何才能看清我是谁,或者我想做什么?’又或者他们想当一名医生或创业经商,却发现所有的门都是紧闭的。” #39;There#39;s also a lot of loneliness and making and breaking of romantic relationships in this period.#39; “这一时期还有很多的孤独感以及与恋人的分分合合。” Many of those issues ease by the late 20s. By then, the vast majority of emerging adults find work, relationships, along with higher self-esteem and life satisfaction, studies show. And most achieve financial independence. The Clark University survey found that while 28% of 18-to-21-year-olds get regular support from their parents for living expenses, the rate declined to 6% among 26-to-29-year-olds. 那些问题到20多岁年龄段后期很多都会缓解。研究表明,到那个时候,绝大多数年轻人都已经找到了工作、爱人以及较高的自信与生活满足感,而且多数人已经实现了经济独立。克拉克大学的那项调查发现,18-21岁年龄段的年轻人中有28%的人定期从父母那里得到生活费,这个比例在26-29岁年龄段下降到了6%。 Meanwhile, says Dr. Arnett, #39;It pays to relax and not panic because your 21-year-old or even your 26-year-old doesn#39;t know what he or she is going to do. Almost nobody still has that problem at 40 or 50. We all figure it out eventually.#39; 与此同时,阿内特说,“不要因为你21岁甚至26岁的子女不知道自己要做什么就感到惊慌,放松心情才有好处。几乎没有人到40或50岁的时候还存在这个问题。我们大家最终都会想明白这个问题的。” /201209/197970

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